I would like to apologize. I have spent the last few weeks staring at my blog site stats, trying to figure out what makes that little line go up rather than writing what I feel will truly best help my readers.
That’s when it hit me – influence is not as complicated as we try to make it in our books and articles. We could follow the ten steps to influence, or we could just care about what’s best for somebody else.
I have a friend who is a General Practitioner. When you go to see him, the first thing he does is greet you as he walks in the door, looking you in the eye. He shakes your hand and pats the top of your hand, asking how you’re doing. Guess what? He actually wants to know.
You never feel rushed, and you always believe he wants to help you more than he wants to charge you. What a nice feeling. He also personally calls you as a follow-up, and writes handwritten notes with every report result so it doesn’t feel so cold and impersonal.
Plus, he’s the best around. I’ve had five other doctors tell me he’s there doctor. So competence is always a nice companion to kindness.
He influences me to do things differently because I trust him, and because I know he truly cares about my health. I’ve realized that in my effort to influence others to read my blog, I stopped caring about them. Instead of addressing the heart with sincere help, I was reading books that gave me gimmicks for building a following.
If you want to influence others, ask yourself: Do I really care about them, or is this about me? Do I look them in the eye? Do I know what their problems are? Can I solve any of those problems? Do I make them feel rushed or do I actively listen to them?
You move other people because they trust you and your opinion. I’m going to get my focus back on my readers, looking at what they need rather than a ridiculous chart line. I guess I’ve learned that influence is a result of caring, and is never driven by self-promotion.
So, let me know if there’s a particular topic around change and influence that you’d like for me to write about. I promise I won’t research it and see if it’s a popular topic. The information will be my gift to you.