My dad’s favorite Thanksgiving tradition was one that my brother, sister and I dreaded. Before the prayer, dad asked each of us to state one thing for which we were thankful.
My brother generally used this opportunity to say something like, “I’m thankful that Donna can’t talk right now because it’s my turn.” He actually prayed once that my tongue would fall out. I found that comment to be unnecessary until I listened to an old cassette recording we made of our family moving across country.
With three teenagers, two adults, a fat dog and a Coleman ice chest crammed in a Hornet AMC wagon, we drove for six days. . .
Our church friends who we were leaving had one request – they wanted a recording of our travels.
So, we got out the trusty tape recorder at random moments. Mom played the ukulele and we sang “You are my Sunshine.” Dad jazzed things up with the melodica while my brother drummed on the dashboard. But when silence loomed, I felt a need to fill it with a plethora of aimless words. The first time I listened to that tape, I understood my brother’s point. My tongue definitely should have fallen out.
But I’m grateful for that trip, for my family, and for those who just wanted to hear our voices. And I wish I walked around in a state of constant gratitude, but I don’t. Grumbling comes naturally to me, much like eating carbs. So here are some facts about gratitude that I am going to post in my office as a reminder that gratitude is always better than grumbling.
.
5 Facts About Gratitude:
- Writing a thank you note makes you happier. I wrote about this topic in Huffington Post this week, because I believe it to be true. One researcher who studied positive interventions, used techniques like listening to music and writing about early memories. His most successful intervention? Having people write a thank you note and deliver it to someone who had helped them. I am currently starting this practice after 54 years of not doing it.
- Writing down three things for which you’re grateful each night improves your outlook on life. I’m not one to keep detailed journals at night since I write all day. Plus, I have the attention span of, well, the average American. So, writing down three things is perfect because it’s simple and it works.
- Making your children state what they’re grateful for at Thanksgiving does not help the children, but it’s great for the adults. Studies show that gratitude is something that comes with emotional maturity and wisdom. I tend to think that children are walking gratitude – celebrating that bug they just found on the sidewalk, or jumping up and down over the chocolate milk treat. Gratitude is a state of being for them.
- Pray or meditate or do something that gets the brain to just be quiet. Trying to quiet the brain is a lot like my brother trying to get me to hush when we were kids. It rarely happens, but when it does it’s a beautiful thing. In silence, your soul gets to whisper wonderful things to you about the simplicity of joy. I tried Bikram Yoga (doing yoga for 90 minutes in 105 degree heat) but found my brain chanting, “Don’t’ throw up, Don’t pass out; Don’t throw up, Don’t pass out.” It wasn’t very peaceful. But getting quiet while watching my birds outside? Sheer contentment. Pure God.
- Realize that gratitude is more powerful than fear. We spend a lot of time praying from a place of tears and fears. “Dear God, please protect me tomorrow as I fly because I’m pretty sure my pilot will be drunk and a flock of birds are waiting like Kamikazes to fly into the plane’s engines.” When we are in a state of being thankful, there is joy in our words and a release from our heart that makes everybody’s day a little better. Even omnipotent spirit. Not that I speak for omnipotence.
During this Week of Thanks . . .
Try to write down three things for which you are grateful. Deliver a thank you note. Get quiet. Have courage.
Focus on what you have, and try to discern if maybe, just maybe, it’s enough.