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A New Year in Old Clothes

Donna HighfillBlog4 commentsJanuary 2, 2017

I welcomed the new year in my sweats from 1985. They still fit, but only because the elastic exploded in 2005.

There is a hole around the upper right thigh, and the white string was sucked into the waistband five years ago and I haven’t seen it since.

I also have a pair of jeans that I love just as much. In fact, I’m wearing them right now, even though I once washed them with a highlighter in the pocket and they are fifty percent yellow.

I wore them the other night when we had friends over, and my daughter walked by and whispered in my ear, “Nice. Wore your good jeans, I see.”

And they ARE my good jeans.

Why?

Because I don’t have to break them in. I don’t have to keep taking Tums because the tight waist has given me heartburn. I don’t have to get up and down because the feeling in my thighs left fifteen minutes earlier.

My old clothes know what they are, and they are unapologetic about it.

In 2017, I want to be more like my old pants. . .

While I might work to be more disciplined, more prolific with my writing, and better known as a speaker, I also want to be comfortable with who I am.

When I become more like my sweatpants, I will:

  • Stop worrying about pleasing people. I have had people critique my writing and call me names I refuse to print here. I have had colleagues who found me too opinionated. I have had coaches who told me to stop being funny and show my heart. Well, being funny IS my heart. It’s how I make people (including myself) feel better. My gifts were given to me at birth, and like my sweatpants, I’m going to wear those gifts out.
  • Stop being uncomfortable. I have a habit of trying to choose topics that interest people around me, but aren’t always intriguing to me. I have chosen work opportunities that tighten my emotional waistband and give me gas. I am often careful about what I share with people, worried that they might not like me. That comes from being a preacher’s kid, where there is a 90% chance you will upset someone every single Sunday. The only thing more uncomfortable than paying attention to what you say is not saying what you mean. So, watch out 2017.
  • Let myself have gaps and focus on the strengths. My sweatpants have more holes than material, but I love the automatic air conditioning those gaps provide. I have discovered that flaws aren’t a problem, they are a part of the solution. I am the whole package, and the flaws provide a chance to breathe between accomplishments.

I know that these resolutions sound great on paper, and that by the end of the day I will be deleting a social media comment because I’m worried that I’ve upset somebody. I realize that tomorrow, somebody will find me too opinionated, and I will keep my husband up until 2:00 a.m. trying to figure it all out.

But I’m not backing off. Why? Because my memory is getting bad and I will forget some of this within the hour. But also, because I want to see what I do in a year where this middle child and preacher’s kid doesn’t try to keep the peace.

So, if you see me on the street in crappy sweatpants, just wave and say, “Good for you!” But if you don’t like satire or a strong opinion, wave from a distance.

Because I am the girl in the travelling sweatpants.

 

Tags: behavior change, donna highfill, inspiration, women and confidence

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4 comments. Leave new

Connie Black
January 3, 2017 12:39 am

Keep rockin it sweatpants girl! I’m a fan!!

Reply
Donna Highfill
January 3, 2017 4:03 am

Oh, I’m rockin’ it big time. Thanks Connie!

Reply
Ann Gallier (formerly Parsons, another change)
January 3, 2017 10:51 am

Donna, it is 5:39 a.m. and I am up and ready to take on 2017. I am going to challenge myself in ways that I have been promising myself for years but for a many self inflicted reasons, have never been able to achieve. I didn’t have the courage to follow through with my dreams because, I, like you, have tried to please everyone around me and somehow lost myself along the way. So, you keep wearing your sweatpants which I am sure you look better in than half of America (have you ever been to Walmart in Tappahanock?) and I will keep setting goals for myself which I will eventually reach. Happy 2017, you keep writing and we will keep reading and laughing. Thank God for a sense of humor.

Reply
Donna Highfill
January 4, 2017 3:52 am

Ann: It is so good to hear from you, and I’m impressed with your discipline! If I am up at 5:39 a.m. it is purely by accident. I’m so proud of you and the courage you are exercising. Congratulations on the current changes and those to come. I would love to reconnect.

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