My last post was several weeks ago, in which I declared that I was going to be more honest in my writing. Then I wrote another blog that was neutral, bland, and had a happy, blah message. Honesty isn’t as easy as I thought it would be.
So here’s some honesty for you . . .
- Sometimes motivational speakers make me feel like I’m not living up to my abilities, and I become even less-disciplined. I guess it’s a form of counter-dependence.
- I occasionally get tired of people telling me to “Give up everything and follow your dream!” when their dream has been funded by someone else. Many of us will follow our dream, but as Elizabeth Gilbert says in her book Big Magic, we have to pay the bills while doing it.
- I am often suspect of perpetually peppy people. I have found some mean motives simmering beneath the those big smiles.
- There are days when people irritate me a little too easily. Like the day I sat by a man in the DMV who smacked his gum. I don’t know if it was the general DMV experience overall or the gum chewing, but I sighed loudly and moved to another seat.
- I am bothered by people with fierce, unbending perspectives on either side of the spectrum. If life has taught me anything, it’s that the truth is always somewhere in the middle. Perhaps I feel that way because I’m the middle child. 🙂
All of that is part of my truth. But taking that into consideration, here’s a little more honesty for you on the flip-side of fussy . . .
- I believe we are inherently good. Even at the age of 56, you can’t convince me otherwise.
- I believe people hurt others because they are wounded themselves. Even sociopaths, who are missing a part of their brain that helps their humanity, come into life damaged.
- I think power is our most-fed desire, but love is our greatest need.
- I believe that those who have passed on still stop by to care for us when we most need it. In fact I know that to be true. But that’s another blog altogether.
- I believe that all anger comes from fear, and that bullies have been bullied themselves. And if you’re a bully and you smack me verbally, I will smack you back. In fact, if you smack me physically, I will smack you back.
But I still love you and your wounded self.
Most of all, know that if I ever see you hurt an animal I might have to take you out, no matter your personal torment.
But I still believe that you started out with hope and promise, and somewhere along the way someone who was wounded, wounded you. . .
And there will be a time, perhaps after this lifetime, when you will rediscover that loving soul hidden beneath all the hate.
I’ve experienced a lot as a preacher’s kid living in tough neighborhoods. Perhaps that’s why I believe in us, because I witnessed wounds when they happened.
And now a discovery . . . I guess my happy, blah messages are my truth.
Wow. I did not see that coming.
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“I believe that those who have passed on still stop by to care for us when we most need it.” – I look forward to this blog post, Donna. I have an 87-year-old mother who is so afraid of dying and I try to assure her that she will still be with us.
Lisa – Write me at [email protected]. I have lots to share!
” I believe people are inherently good..” and reminding ourself daily we are inherently good helps our perspective, self worth and approach to others. Just finished a great book by James Altchuer, “Choose Yourself” It reminds us to balance our physical, emotional, mental and spiritual foundation. Donna- thanks again for reminding us…
Kathleen – I have not heard of that book, but will definitely order it! Thanks so much.
I believe that those who have passed on still stop by to care for us when we most need it. In fact I know that to be true. But that’s another blog altogether. – Interested in this post!
I’m also a middle child and feel this way – I am bothered by people with fierce, unbending perspectives on either side of the spectrum. If life has taught me anything, it’s that the truth is always somewhere in the middle.
Thanks, Kelly. We should start a middle child blog :). And, you and others have asked about the line of “those who have passed on.” I’m working on a book right now that should be completed in the next month. I’ll start an “interested” list and let you know when it’s ready!
Um, I’m interested! I just lost my dog, Luca, to cancer in January, and still talk to him daily. I know we’ll be together again, but it sure would be encouraging to hear your perspective on whether you think he hears me:). Donna, your blogs always seem honest to me. You’re a real person, and express the same joys and hurts the rest of us experience, but often with a twist (usually humorous, sometimes just raw) that helps the rest of us cope. Thank you!!!
Melissa – thank you, always, for your comments. I sent you a response via email! Donna
I like to believe most of the world is good. I also know those who passed on are still around. I have to believe this.
Ah, Michele, it is absolutely true!
Wise words Donna. You and me must have gone to the same school of wisdom. Thank you for sharing your truths.