I was listening to Chris Berman on ESPN last Sunday before football began. I’ve always wondered why his nickname was Boomer, but I believe I figured it out.
Even at 54 years-old, I tire of his out-of-date references. While he is a broadcasting legend, many of his famous nicknames reveal that he and the past are joined at the hip – i.e. Dave Clark Five or Tom A Story About A Man Named Brady. He quotes Artie Johnson from “Laugh-in” on a regular basis . . . “verrry interesting.” And he alludes to rock ‘n roll lines from the Bay City Rollers. He lives, unapologetically, in the past.
Perhaps he misses his glory days. Since I never really had those, I’m happy being in the present. Right now. Even with my waist expanding by the minute and enough hair on the bathroom floor to weave a rug.[quote button_text=”Tweet the Quote”]But I must admit to moments when I have a Boomer relevancy slip.[/quote] For example, the other day I saw some teenagers tossing a football around and one girl got hit in the face. I almost yelled out, “Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!” But I stopped myself, because I don’t think they would enjoy Brady Bunch jokes as much as I might. Perhaps Chris Berman and I should go to dinner and share our Brady stories.
Ways to Stay Relevant
As I continued walking, I thought of a few other ways all of us Boomers could stay relevant:
- When your child or grandchild asks you about your favorite song, don’t let yourself get all dreamy-eyed and say, “I Wanna Be Free by Davy Jones.” Davy Jones, rest in peace, is not a name they will know. And when you further explain that he was in a group called The Monkees, you will have lost all pop-culture credibility.
- When purchasing a poster for the younger generation, try to avoid quotes from the 70’s, such as “Love means never having to say you’re sorry.” Not only was that a bad quote, but it came from a really bad movie. I’m sorry, but was I the only one hoping Ali McGraw’s character would kick the bucket so I wouldn’t have to listen to any more of her bad acting? Even her coughs were badly delivered.
- If someone from a younger generation asks if you watch The Walking Dead, don’t say “Does that star Gary Cooper?”
- When you see something really cool, try not to yell out, “Wow, that’s hip!” My husband does this on a regular basis, and I told him that one day he’s going to yell out, “Ow, my hip!” and we are not going to respond.
- Try to keep your knick-knacks relevant. If they are things of value, like Hummels, you’re good. Money lasts forever — just ask the khaki pants worn by the Kennedy boys. But if you have a series of troll dolls lining your shelves, you might want to pack them up. I did love those guys, though. I’m not sure why. Maybe because I was always better looking than my troll dolls, even in Junior High School during my eye-teeth-fang phase. I definitely preferred my trolls over Barbie; that bitch with her tiny waist and perfect boobs killed my self-esteem for years.
I believe that relevancy is just good manners. It says, “I think your thoughts and ideas are worthy of my energy, next generation.” You can honor the past without living in it. Plus, things don’t change as much as you think they do.
I mean, are troll dolls really that different from the guys on Duck Dynasty?