Slow Down, You Move Too Fast

One of my all time favorite songs is “Feelin’ Groovy” by Simon and Garfunkel, which is ironic because it’s all about slowing down. For anyone who knows me, slowing down is not my strong suit.

While putting on make-up in the morning, I am preparing for intense conversations that could be coming my way (or I pretend I’m on “Ellen” being all charming and totally cracking her up with my witty repartee).

I run around the house trying to gather my diet food, vitamins, dog food (not for me, for the doggie daycare my dog attends), and multiple folders that I bring home every night. Yes, every night I come home with enough work to fill the year, and generally end up staring at my over-sized Barnes & Noble book bag while doing absolutely nothing but stressing about what I’m not getting done.

Once I run out of the house, I return to it at least three times in search of cell phones, keys, and the dog who is wondering why I left him in the house since he is leashed up and ready to go to school.

In the car I start my CD of Mumsford & Sons (awesome CD) that is kind of like punk rock meets folk music. Then I channel Dale Earnhardt, finding the perfect moment to switch lands to avoid the slow driver, and taking off from lights so quickly I burn up 1/4 tank of gas.

Yes, every stoplight is chance for a race, and I’ve never lost. I even demoralized a teenage boy who was in his fast and furious Integra with his girlfriend. He revved his engine for a third time as the light turned green, and I left him in the dust of humiliation.

Arriving at work I try to figure out the best way to microwave my Jenny Craig oatmeal square and get a spoon for my yogurt while getting a Diet Coke out of the refrigerator as I make copies of an assignment.

No wonder I’m exhausted when I finally get home. Yes, come about 6:30 I am catatonic, sitting in front of the most mindless television shows because I have hit the wall.

I think I should listen to “Feelin’ Groovy” every morning instead of my punk rock. I really do move too fast. My morning doesn’t last, and I don’t kick down the cobblestones. Tomorrow, I’m going to find some fun. Of course I’ll want it fast . . .

Just as an FYI, here is the Mumsford & Sons CD. You’ll love it.

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